I went climbing tonight. Eric and I have been trying to go every Sunday, just to keep ourselves active and for the last couple of weeks we've been pretty successful at going consistantly. We never really go for very long, since we both get off of work at five and the gym closes at eight, but we can usually get a nice bit of climbing in.
Sometimes, climbing feels great. I get off of the wall, and even if I don't finish a route, it feels good to just get up there and do it. Even when climbing doesn't feel great, its usually at least a good time. But every once in a while, there's a night when everything just feels like shit and tonight was one of those nights. Everything was off. My feet were wrong, my arms were weak and I wouldn't have been able to hang on to a monkey's ass if it had stretched it out and defecated on me. Horrible.
But that's sort of how life has been going lately. Sometimes, its wonderful. I know where I'm going and how to get there. And even when its not great, its at least not horrible. But more and more often, it feels like shit, like I don't quite know what to do with myself. Unsure of what I really want and if I'm doing what I need to get there.
With climbing, I can just take off my shoes and harness, walk away from the wall and wait till next time, when surely it'll be better. But you can't do that in real life. Still, things have to get better, right?
Lauren,
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry that you're feeling down. If you're still interested, my friend is more than willing to talk to you about Wisconsin's history program. Call me up if you want the info. And also to catch up.
Babe of course it can get better. We shouldn’t have to question that, we all sink to a low every once and a while, and other aspects of our lives may reflect that e.g. Climbing. Sometimes it doesn’t last long, sometimes it seems like it will never end. Even worse some lows come back to haunt you. Cheesy sure but no matter how low we get, there will be a time of prosper again, unfortunately another low will eventually follow. It may be nasty to think about but maybe these lows are a time when we are learning something, it may not be clear what at the time, but in the end we may gain something unconsciously. Its what we have in our lives that we have to think about to help us get through it. Circumstances are always different I know, but believe me the low may not end soon, but it will end. I know I have been there more than once. You know I have.
ReplyDeleteObviously, more nonesense needs a little 'me time' to get in touch with his feelings. And PJ, I think complaining about how you can't drink as much as you used to on your blog counts (in your case, at least) toward writing about a shitty personal life.
ReplyDeleteWow I didn’t intend on my post to have a reaction like this, more nonsense I didn’t think you were criticizing, but if you need a hug hey let me know.
ReplyDeleteI don’t think the blog has become the domain of voicing negative personal events. From reading others it seems to be a domain of voicing many personal events. The majority seems to be negative yes. Though every time I get together with friends we all complain the majority of the time, about work, or a movie, people, and so on. We vent, and isn’t that how we get into some discussions, complain, then disagree, and discuss? Blogs seem have added to the “conventional” reaching-out system, not replace. About it becoming less private… The original post compared crappy climbing to a moment of crappyness in life, without actually saying what was crappy, making it somewhat private to the writer and closest friends. Well my first post, and I stir all that up. Sorry no hard feelings I hope. Hey isn’t that another aspect of a blog, a place to engage in “friendly” debate?
By the way, I want to apologies to Lauren. I told her my first post would be on her Second Century. How when she said she returned to finish her two missed shots, she meant “retuned to finish my two missed shots……and take two more”. Four not two, I would know I was the one Holding her hair, giving her water, and flushing the toilet, for over two hours. Am I complaining?
ReplyDeleteJust to clarify:
ReplyDeletePJ, I wasn't at all offended by your comment, but I'd say that regaling us with your tales of the Philly Cheesesteak of Death is just about as shitty as personal life gets.
(Take that, o punster!)
I guess I didn't call/write/email/etc because there was nothing specific really bothering me. I was just feeling sort of down about a night of shitty climbing and that got me down in general (one of those things was missing my friends, whom I will call more often)
And I only vaguely remember taking two extra shots...I believe I said something like "oh it was only two? What the hell, lets make it an even five"
let's all go to the lobby, let's all go to the lobby, let's all go to the loooooobby......and have ourselves a snack!
ReplyDeleteok, now we all understand each other.
Erm, I was just jokin' around, man. I thought maybe the 'me time' comment would make a decent clue, but I guess it's like Dee said to me earlier: tone of voice doesn't really translate well over the Internet.
ReplyDeleteYou're always in my thoughts, DiStefano. Heartache to heartache, we stand.
Lauren, I enjoy your blog very much. Sorry about this little hijacking.
So yeah, I've never been rock climbing before, not even at a gym. Rappelling on the other hand I've done. Always been too much of a wuss to really climb too high.
But what a useful skill! If there's an earthquake or fire, Dee and I can use our handy-dandy window escape device, complete with rope, harness, and a dubious-looking pulley system. I'll post a pic of it sometime.
also, Lauren, if you are still bummed (and assuming you are in fact a Tucson resident), get yourself to El Corral. I could never ever be blue after eating there. especially if i got more than one prickly pear margarita. *drooling*
ReplyDeleteSo, look. There was a fight apparently and I wasn't involved.
ReplyDeleteAnyway - don't feel down, Lauren. Just remember, no matter how bad things get, or how poorly you climb, you're still friends with me.
Mike,
ReplyDeleteI can belay and climb but I can't rappell, which is weird. You shouldn't be too scared to climb, at least at the gym. You're connected to another person, and if you fall, they'll catch you (or they're supposed to, anyway. Lots of trust involved in climbing, i.e. letting your worst enemy belay is akin to giving him a knife, the key to your house and explicit directions to where you sleep). I feel even safer climbing rather than being lowered since if the ropes fail, I can at least hold on to the rock. But that doesn't say much, since honestly, when you're fifty feet up, if the rope broke, the rock wouldn't be much comfort. Its fun though, you should try it.
Dee,
Is that the place up on River? River and Campbell maybe? I"ll have to try it though. Prickly pear margaritas sound damn fine.
By the way, congrats on getting married, you two. I hadn't heard, but I'm completely unsurprised. Your blog is great too!
Andy,
In my darkest hours, when the light of dawn seems but a distant memory of hope, I have the thought of you, O Crapmaster, to shine forth a beacon of truth. You truly are the Negative Touchstone of Truth! (and I'm only half hyperbole, here). Thanks!
Thanks Lauren! yes, it is on river just east of Campbell. after my parents house, it is the #1 place i'm homesick for. you're not a vegetarian are you? cause then there would be no point. except, of course, the margaritas.
ReplyDeleteVegetarians should be shot and then force-fed to other vegetarians.
ReplyDelete